Gone AWOL: Inspiration, inclination and all traces of a sense of humour

So much for pregnancy providing me with blog fodder. There's nothing to report. I'll be up to 13 weeks tomorrow, I still don't have a fundus to palpate, and of course I can't feel any movements yet. I don't do morning sickness, so I can't regale you with embarrassing episodes of public vomiting, or even whinge about lying on the couch all day feeling crap. I haven't had any weird food cravings and only a few really boring aversions which aren't worth talking about. Possibly the only interesting thing I could mention is my search for a midwife but at the moment I'm in limbo either waiting for people to get back to me or plucking up the courage to make phone calls to Japanese people who speak varied amounts of English, so even there I don't have much to say.

I read over a bunch of my early posts on this blog when I was recording my pregnancy with Cassia. Dang, I had a sense of humour back then! (I will thank Kaz Cooke for the inspiration, even though I qualify any recommendation of Up the Duff as being for its humour value only.) What's happened to me? Vast amounts of sleep deprivation have contributed to it, I'm sure. But I dunno, maybe I do have PND after all. I remember one of the questions on the survey I filled out when Cassia was 8 weeks old -- you know the type, the ones where you rate on a scale of 1-5 how true a statement is for you, the ones for which the correct answers if you want to avoid being diagnosed with PND are screamingly obvious -- being "I no longer see the funny side of things". These days, meh, I can't be bothered trying to think of a witty way to say what I'm thinking.

Can't be bothered. That's another problem. It feels like the effort to write posts for this blog outweigh the benefits. In some ways Cassia is becoming a lot more independent so you'd think I'd have more time here. But the flip side is that she's also a lot more demanding and interactive, so when she isn't playing independently (which is most of the time), it is very difficult for me to give my blog the kind of uninterrupted attention I need to give it in order to write anything worthwhile. And I just can't be bothered drafting, because that requires constant refreshing of my thoughts and reminders of what I was trying to say in the first place.

I wasn't actually planning to have a whinge in this post. It's just come out that way. And now it's after 10:00 p.m. and I'm going to bed. Good night.